momhood
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12 things I never thought I’d do before becoming a mom

We buried my sweet, lively grandmother this past weekend.  She left us in December and we were finally able to have closure on Saturday, though I miss her an awful lot.  Here she is in 1954 when my father was just an infant.

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I wasn’t able to say Happy Mother’s Day to you all because things were so hectic.  So, to lighten things up a bit, I’d like to share with you some of the crazy, funny things I simply never could have known I’d ever do.

  1. Pick undigested grape skins out of the washer after washing diapers.
  2. Do a full song and dance routine when a certain little dude doesn’t want to eat dinner.
  3. Make loud razz/fart noises with my mouth/hand merely because it makes my child laugh.
  4. While out for a jog with the stroller, actually run HARDER because the jiggling/speed makes him laugh.  Normally I’d, uh, probably stop running if people were laughing at me.
  5. Memorize a full library of children’s books to use when needed (fussy car rides or full blown changing table protests).
  6. Google “wheels on the bus lyrics” because I didn’t know much past “the horn on the bus goes beep, beep, beep” and honestly, that GD song is the best distraction.  I also had to Google “Baa Baa Black Sheep lyrics” because I didn’t know who else got a darn bag of wool besides the master and the little boy down the lane.
  7. Realize that I’m still watching Sesame Street even after Anderson has moved on to something else.  Part 2 of this is thinking murderous thoughts about Elmo because his “La la la la, la la la la, Elmo’s world…” song is always stuck in my head.  Part 3 is thinking murderous thoughts about my husband because he walks around singing that song, too.
  8. See my husband dance his way into the living room during “Dance Party Living Room” where there is some loud music and some seriously bad dancing going on from all three of us.
  9. Eat soggy cheerios merely because they were offered to me (how could I refuse?) or eat the remnants off of someone else’s spoon for that matter.
  10. Think it is funny when another human being drools in my mouth.
  11. Go out to lunch with friends with pee in my hair and a little vomit on my shirt and shrug, “oh well.”
  12. Sing at the top of my lungs in the middle of the grocery store just because my kid is smiling about it.

This was supposed to be a list of 10, but I could go on and on.  I also never knew I could love another human as much as this little boy who has stolen my heart, which by far is #1 on the list.
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Speaking of being a mom, I also want to give a belated shout out to my mom.  Here’s a picture of her in 1979 with my sister and I.  I’m so grateful for her every single day of my life.  How cute is she?

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Keep dancing and singing mommas.  Also, I think it is OK to want to throw the remote at Elmo and Mr. Noodle from time to time.  It’s healthy.

1 Comment

  1. Hysterical! So many of those are universal. My list would include that whole yucky part where we become human tissues. Sure- wipe it on me, why not? ❤

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